American society idolizes the "snap-back" and "Super Mom" personas. Women are expected to be top-performing immediately after having a baby. This is detrimental in many ways, and beneficial in very few.
The fourth trimester is the nickname for the period immediately following childbirth. In most cultures, the first 40 days are considered the fourth trimester. In other countries, women are expected to rest, forget about household chores and to-do lists, build a strong breastfeeding relationship, bond with baby, and allow their bodies to heal completely. Unfortunately, in America, that is not the way the postpartum period is treated.
Many women have been seeing their obstetrician or midwife every 1-2 weeks for the last 3 months of their pregnancy. The big day arrives when baby is born, and then all of a sudden, the mother is expected to go 6 weeks without a doctor's visit. At the 6 week appointment, the majority of women receive the OK to resume physical and sexual activity without so much as a hands-on examination. The reality is that most women are not ready for either of those things at 6 weeks, especially if they've spent the last 6 weeks taking care of household chores, grocery shopping, entertaining visitors, and everything else that comes along with being a new mom in America. After the doctor gives approval, it is not expected that the new mother come in for anything else regarding this pregnancy unless an issue arises. At home, the mother may have a partner who isn't the most helpful, or maybe they are helpful, but they can't relate to all of the changes the new mother is going through. This can make the postpartum period very difficult.
What can new mothers do differently?
Rachelle, a new mom, recounts "It took me until kid #4 to realize as a cosleeping, breastfeeding a newborn, tired mom; that dad sleeping in a different bedroom was truly the best way to ensure one of us could think and drive... I seriously think you should be allowed to hibernate for 2 weeks with your baby mostly skin to skin and not be expected to do much else in life, I mean no expectations other than nourishing this new life, unless of course you want to and are able and supported. I unapologetically will let anyone cook and clean for me and treat me like a goddess incarnate. I shouldn't feel guilt for not continuing those tasks temporarily. Just guiltless, non-judged, hibernation with baby is what I wanted. Okay maybe dashed with some accolades for my efforts, 'cause even recovering from childbirth if it was rough, is really hard while keeping a new human alive, even if you do get space and support."
In the book, The Fourth Trimester written by Kimberly Ann Johnson, there is a ton of information regarding the fourth trimester postpartum period. Some of the main arguments that she makes involve establishing a solid support system, resting in the home for the first 40 days, eating nourishing meals, and seeking postpartum care from a doula, lactation consultant, pelvic floor physical therapist, massage therapist, and other professionals who can serve to create an easier postpartum experience.
The book, The First Fourty Days: The Essential Art of Nourishing the New Mother by Heng Ou, is highly recommended for new mothers, and it emphasizes nourishing the new mother's body and mind. Many of the recipes found in Johnson's book came from Ou's book.
Ultimately, there needs to be a shift in postpartum care for the health of women after giving birth. Many home birth midwives and birth center midwives incorporate postpartum wellness care into their model of practice. Women who receive care from these midwives will expect to have multiple home visits from their midwife in the first week, and then, weekly visits for the next 5 weeks, giving the new mother 6 weeks of care from her primary maternal health provider. The midwife will serve the mother in a number of ways including lactation support, physical wound care, nutritional support, mental health support and prevention, and baby care. Many midwives also host consistent and regular community groups for new moms to find support beyond the first 6 weeks postpartum, and most of the groups are free of charge.
It's time for a nationwide shift to better care for the mothers. They are the ones who are responsible for raising the next generation.
Desirae, you have great blogging skills. All of your pictures have a purpose and add interest to the story. Your writing is very clear and intellectual, but it never comes off as difficult to understand or conceited. I can tell that you care deeply about your topic, and you have done a great job thus far.
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